Top Quotes
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#926 Up↑ /61 Down↓ [Report] 2009-12-30 17:12 EST
Student: Mr. Orlando, did you know you really look like this kid, Isaac?
Mr. Orlando: I don't know who that is...
Student: Well I told Isaac that and he said "I'll be on the lookout for a handsome and tall teacher"
Mr. Orlando: Awww. Thank you.
Student: No, I didn't...
Student: *sigh* You're welcome. -
#295 Up↑ /77 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-20 13:49 EST
// Chemistry teacher is getting fed up with a student who hasn't answered any questions right.
Chemistry teacher: You know that show? Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader? We should play Are You Smarter Than This Kid.
Chemistry teacher: We pick the stupidest kid in the class and ask questions to contestants, and the kid will realize how stupid they are.
Student: That's horrible!
Chemistry teacher: No, it's great! The kid is suddenly rejected by society, and becomes a total loner.
Chemistry teacher: He spends his time secluded from everybody else, just reading. And that's how he makes his way in the world.
Chemistry teacher: If we don't tell them they're retarded, they'll never be able to make up for it and be successful!
Chemistry teacher: You see, that's what I do with my kids. -
#1186 Up↑ /33 Down↓ [Report] 2010-05-01 21:34 EDT
// Dr. Pilloff consults the class on testicles and The Simpsons
Dr. Pilloff: *pointing to diagram* I know some people eat testicles, so I guess if you cut a cow testicle in half, you'd see this.
Dr. Pilloff: And I don't know which testicles people eat, but in one episode Homer Simpson went out west and shot a buffalo and ate its testicles? Is that right?
// A week later
Dr. Pilloff: We discussed how some people eat animal testicles?
Dr. Pilloff: Well everyone should be eating plant ovaries.
Dr. Pilloff: Because it's very healthy.
