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• #262 Up↑ +155/173 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-09 22:44 EST

  // Mr. Mott looks at posters of Hendrix surrounding the door to his room.
  Mr. Mott: Who put all those BLACK posters outside my room?
  *dead silence*
  Mr. Mott: I LIKE 'em.

  Tags: hendrix mott

• #261 Up↑ +101/117 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-09 22:33 EST

  // Mr. Cocoros is reading out ridiculous answers got back on a test
  Mr. C: So, the question was "What's your favorite color?"
  Mr. C: Answer? "No, because it's PARALLEL."

  Tags: cocoros math test

• #259 Up↑ +59/79 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-09 17:48 EST

  Dr. O'Malley: You guys are my favorite period 7 class ever of Fall '08.

  Tags: chemistry o'malley

• #258 Up↑ +95/105 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-08 19:55 EST

  Student: Have you ever tried weed?
  Teacher: Okay, my lawyer has told me exactly what to say in this case.
  Teacher: No, I've never tried it and neither should you. It is bad for you, very bad.

  Tags: weed

• #257 Up↑ +115/141 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-08 19:49 EST

  O'Malley: What the fluorine?!

  Notes: Fluorine's element symbol is F

  Tags: chemistry o'malley

• #254 Up↑ +107/123 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-08 19:40 EST

  // While doing some experiment
  O'Malley: Don't try this at home, kids; do it at your friend's house.

  Tags: chemistry o'malley

• #252 Up↑ +58/64 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-08 19:37 EST

  // Teacher was trying to play a DVD without the remote and was having trouble selecting some option
  Student: It's touchscreen; you have to press the option on the screen!
  *teacher actually does it, repeatedly*
  Teacher: IT'S NOT WORKING! Here, you try!

  Notes: [admin note:] We'd all be lost if Stuy kids started running the classes

  Tags: stuy television world.history

• #251 Up↑ +70/80 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-08 15:37 EST

  // Physics: Mr. Dreyfus is doing a homework review. Some students in the back are discussing large finite sets. Mr. Dreyfus hears them.
  Mr. Dreyfus: YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS VERY LARGE AND FINITE?!
  *class turns their heads towards Mr. Dreyfus*
  *long pause*
  Mr. Dreyfus (softly): The... fact... that this class... is going to be quiet now.

  Tags: dreyfus large.finite.sets physics

• #250 Up↑ +46/58 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-08 00:29 EST

  Student: Clinton. He was a good role model.
  English teacher: A good role model? He got blowjobs in the oral... ora... ov... OVAL office!

  Tags: clinton english

• #249 Up↑ +56/66 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-06 22:14 EST

  Mr. Colon: Some of the answers people picked were really out there. I probably could've put peanut butter and jelly, and people would think, "Oh, damn, I'm hungry, I should pick that."

  Tags: colon

• #246 Up↑ +57/73 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-04 21:09 EST

  // In Mr Garfinkel's English class:
  Mr. Garfinkel: We should all have cat names: Leopard, Puma, Ocelot, Cougar, Mountain Lion, Cheetah... but not Cheetah because this ain't no place fo' Cheatas!

  Tags: ap.english cat garfinkel

• #244 Up↑ +12/26 Down↓ [Report] 2008-12-03 22:41 EST

  Dr. Akintunde: Can anyone guess what is hemoglobinuria?
  *Dr. A writes it on the board*
  Dr. Akintunde: What is hemoglobin? What is -uria?
  Girl: Hemoglobin in urine?
  Dr. Akintunde: Yes, and the urine appears red. Can anyone guess what is hematuria?
  Boy: Hemoglobin in turd?

  Notes: hematuria = presence of red blood cells in urine

  Tags: akintunde medical.diagnosis

• #238 Up↑ +46/62 Down↓ [Report] 2008-11-28 18:47 EST

  // Shouted down a hallway
  Student: Abstinence sucks balls!... Well, not literally.

  Tags: abstinence sex

• #237 Up↑ +126/144 Down↓ [Report] 2008-11-28 01:33 EST

  Ms. Bushman: You were gone [in the bathroom] for a really long time.
  Student: Yeah, there was a lot of demand and not enough supply.

  Tags: ap.micro bushman

• #236 Up↑ +407/447 Down↓ [Report] 2008-11-28 01:30 EST

  // Dr. O'Malley reading a list of organic chemistry questions that students submitted on the first day
  - What is organic chemistry?
  - What's an electrophile?
  - Are you married?

  Tags: chemistry o'malley

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