Quote Browser
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#1837 Up↑ /107 Down↓ [Report] 2011-04-03 09:37 EDT
// Learning about diluted solutions
Mr. Orlando: So. you have this glass of Kool-Aid. And you're about to drink it. But then your friend comes along, thirsty, and says, "You know, I think the only thing that was satisfy my thirst would be a glass of Kool-Aid!" What would you do?
Mr. Orlando: Well, the Republican answer would be, "I'll drink the Kool-Aid because I earned it! My friend can drink water."
Mr. Orlando: The Communist answer is, "I, Mr. Orlando, am supreme ruler, and I get all the Kool-Aid. You, my underlings, get meager rations of water."
Mr. Orlando: The Democratic answer is, "Let's pour half the Kool-Aid down the drain and ration what's left!"
Mr. Orlando: That's your lesson in politics for the day. -
#1835 Up↑ /89 Down↓ [Report] 2011-04-01 20:46 EDT
// After most senior college acceptances/rejections came out...
Dr. Pathak: It's really okay... You guys shouldn't feel so bad since you're still so young... I applied to Stanford 3 times and got rejected all 3 times... But somehow I still have a good job here. -
#1818 Up↑ /135 Down↓ [Report] 2011-03-25 22:33 EDT
// Discussing a character's masturbation habits
Male student: So yeah, I just felt like it was kind of awkward to read.
Mr. Garfinkel: Awkward? In a room filled with teenage boys?!
Mr. Garfinkel: Come on, how many of you thought it was awkward? DON'T RAISE YOUR HANDS.
Mr. Garfinkel: ...On second thought, keep your hands where I can see them.
